Pink Dot Piddle Peddler

We got new life insurance at the job
We had to take a "test" before getting it
We made a phone call to the medical lab
We made an appointment for them to come to the house
We had them come on a week night
We had them come at 7:00
We made with the pee in a cup
We signed forms
We waved goodbye as the Pink Dot Piddle Peddler finally left

Here's my point.

I can't get the cable/gas/electric/water company to come to the house without promising them my right testicle and first born child.

Yet,

I can simply pick up the phone and call a place that will make an appointment for whenever I want, to come to me at my house to collect my urine. They COME TO ME TO GET MY PEE. This is the kind of Pink Dot service I did not know existed.

But it begs the question, why can't stuff I need or want by brought to me where I am whenever I want or need it? If some random woman can come to me and fill up two vials of my piss, I SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET A FATBURGER BACON EGG SANDWICH MESSENGERED TO MY DOORSTEP WHENEVER THE MOOD STRIKES ME!

I'm just saying. Someone needs to take this customer service epiphany and run with it.

On a side note, I will never EVER complain about my job again. Well, at least not as much as I do now. At the very least, I'm not going door to door to collect random strangers wee-wee.

Perhaps this is one of those karma whiplash/purgatory jobs we all fear. Right up there with jizz mopping at a sleazy porn theater or working at the DMV.